I always thought I wasn’t “good at relationships”. Turns out, I just hadn’t met the right person. It took a lot of trial and error, being single for a long time, and introspection/solidifying my values, but I finally met that person. He’s the most loving, supportive, patient person I’ve ever known. It was well worth the wait, and I’m so glad I trusted my intuition and never settled for something less than I truly deserved and wanted.
That said, I often need to remind myself that a relationship requires thoughtfulness. It requires us to swallow our pride. It requires us to be selfless (or sometimes, selfish! See # 3). Below are some of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever received about relationships, and I wanted to share them with you. These things may come natural for a lot of you; I, on the other hand, sometimes need a little reality check!
1. Express appreciation.
Try not to assume your partner knows that you are grateful for the things they do. Tell them every chance you get. The person who loves you usually just wants to please you. Hearing that their actions makes you happy encourages them to keep it up! Positive reinforcement works…everybody wins.
2. Be present.
Enjoy downtime with your partner, and be in the moment. Men have a knack for compartmentalizing, meaning they can generally leave work at work, and be able to focus in on relaxing/shifting gears. This is more difficult for women. We dwell on the past, or worry about what’s coming next. The present moment is the place of enjoyment, and peace. It allows us to listen better, stress less, and be the best partner we can be.
3. Do you.
This is a big one for me. If I neglect myself, I eventually start to feel a little bit resentful. Ultimately, we as individuals are responsible for our own happiness. It’s not fair for us to place that expectation on our partners. Take care of yourself when you’re feeling down or anxious. Do things that will empower you, cheer you up, make you smile, and lift your spirit while honoring your soul. For me, this might be going for a run with my dog, practicing yoga, listening to inspirational music, or going shopping for some new makeup. Take care of you first, and your relationships will thrive.
I hope you enjoyed this mini list. What simple things do you practice in your relationship to keep it healthy and happy? I look forward to hearing your thoughts!